Catfight Report Movie Review: Obsessed (Beyonce Knowles vs Ali Larter)

CATFIGHT REPORT MOVIE REVIEW:

OBSESSED

BEYONCE KNOWLES VS ALI LARTER

Make no doubt about it..........this is considered the "mainstream" catfight of 2009.

There has not been a catfight that has received this much attention (in the movies) since Teri Hatcher battled Charlize Theron in 2 Days in the Valley.    (Read our review of that movie - HERE)

The sub-headline of this movie is "All is fair when love is war".   Catchy.    We agree with this sentiment at the Catfight Report.   It's largely the reason most catfights happen in the first place.    Duh!

Ali Larter plays the character of "Lisa Sheridan".    She is blond, she is attractive, and she becomes a temporary where the husband of "Sharon Charles" (Beyonce Knowles) just received a large promotion.

The plot is very simple.   Like any other red blooded man on the planet........Sharon's husband is extremely attracted to Ali Larter.    (Again, Duh!)    Basically, a little bit of this, a little bit of that, and you hit the fast forward button until you come near to the very end of the flick.

Catfight!

All of the elements are here.   A hot blond trying to steal another woman's man while lying in her bed!   How novel!    Ali is dressed in a white nightie gown as Beyonce is quite angry at this little tart for all of the trouble she has caused.

ALI:   I'm so sorry.    We didn't want you to find out this way.....
BEYONCE:   I knew it would come to this.....
ALI:   I know.....how hard it must be.......to have someone fall out of love with you.........I know......
BEYONCE:   You are completely delusional.........I'm going to have the cops deal with your crazy ass.....
ALI:    WAIT!

Ali then grabs Beyonce by the shoulder.

BEYONCE:   Don't touch me......

Beyonce tries to walk away but Ali forcefully pulls Beyonce back to her.

ALI:   We can talk about th......
BEYONCE:   I TOLD YOU DON'T TOUCH ME!   

Beyonce then forcefully shoves Ali to the floor and tries to walk away but Ali lets out a shriek and forcefully
tackles Beyonce to the ground!     The catfight is on!

MEOW!

The two struggle fiercely on the floor for position and Beyonce kicks Ali into the wall.    Ali grabs a lamp and
attempts to smash it across Beyonce's head but misses as it crashes into the floor.    With both females now standing up, Ali tries to take the lamp stick as she attempts to jab Beyonce with it.   Beyonce uses the door for leverage as we get a short cut scene of Beyonce's husband.

(Note to producers in Hollywood:    Please stop with the cut scenes during catfights!   Thank you!)

Ali and Beyonce are struggling at the door during this cut scene.   Ali then runs back towards the bed as the phone is now ringing.   It's the husband of Beyonce.   Ali picks the phone up, the husband is shocked Ali is there,  (yada yada)

Beyonce nails a wicked headbutt to Ali's head and then takes the phone away from Ali.   Beyonce speaks
to her husband:

BEYONCE:    Derek.   I'm going to call you back......

Beyonce is all fired up at this point as she chases Ali into the hallway and starts ripping her back and forth against the rails.   Beyonce talks some smack while pulling Ali across the floor by her ankle.   Beyonce is trying to pull Ali as Ali is hanging on to the rails.    Ali kicks her away, but Beyonce mounts Ali, and then nails her with a very hard punch to the face.

Beyonce then pulls her up and slugs her once again!    The two women struggle for position and Ali busts Beyonce under the chin as she falls back against the guardrail.    Ali is now suddenly in control for the first time as Beyonce's back is against the rail as Ali is leaning forward and choking her.

Beyonce finally powers out of the choke as the two women tangle for position in the hallway.   Ali falls to the side and rolls a bit.    Beyonce grabs hold of Ali's ankle again but receives a hard kick in the face.    Ali then dissapears as a stunned Beyonce looks around and tries to find her.

After a few moments, Ali runs towards Beyonce and starts hitting her with an object.   Beyonce dodges some of the blows and Ali connects with a few.   Ali then grabs a big board and we have a short sequence where
Beyonce challenges Ali to come forward.

Ali takes a few good swings, but then in the most anti-climatic lame ending in movie history, Ali falls through the floor and is being held in mid-air by Beyonce while she dangles with certain death below her.

(Note to Producers:    Please stop ending catfight scenes with this crap!    Have a clear winner and a clear loser.   Woman to Woman!   Doesn't matter if it's the good or bad girl.   Please stop with these cheesy endings!   Please!)

Ali then falls to her death.

Until this "not very well thought out" ending, this catfight had a ton of potential.   Two big hollywood names.   Both are beautiful. The storyline was standard but passable.   The action could have been better but wasn't bad.

And then........an ending like that!

Such a waste to a perfectly good catfight!   And to think those people get paid the big bucks!

Still think it's worth a watch?

Watch it right now on demand or purchase on DVD but clicking the links below